MENDS programs are designed around,
and the organisation aims always to function upon,
the following values. We commit to living these
values in all our dealings. We invite challenge,
if at any point an observer feels that a gap exists
between the following and what is observed as our
Responsibility - Understanding where
one's personal responsibility starts and ends
is held to be the only viable foundation for being
humanly effective and accepting what is outside
one's personal sphere of control.
Consciousness - The commitment to being
alert and present enables informed decisions based
on personal, interpersonal and situational needs.
and Commitment to Relationship - We maintain
that one of the most effective places to discover
one's self and therefore identify a foundation
for satisfying personal development is within
the intimacy of a close, personal, and where achievable,
of Significant Relationships - We hold
that significant relationships have been built
upon significant investment so therefore believe
that the termination of such relationships by
either party should be an action of a last resort,
and most particularly where children are involved.
MENDS regards a safe, healthy family environment
with the natural parents as the preferred environment
for raising healthy children.
of Parental Relations for Healthy Child Development
- MENDS maintains that both natural parents hold
particular significance for the development of
healthy self-esteem for their children which stewardship
does not alter following parental relationship
breakdown. MENDS does all in its power to encourage
parents to resolve their differences and to deal
with each other civilly in the interests of the
health and wellbeing of their children.
a Changing World - The influence of feminist
thinking is acknowledged as predominantly a healthy
step in human development. MENDS believes Australian
men can benefit through becoming more aware of
the roles they have unconsciously adopted in a
changing world. Men and healthy masculinity have
much of value to offer community and humanity.
as a Men's-Only Program - MENDS has been
designed as a men's program run by men, not because
there is any design to exclude women perse, but
to accelerate the healing of men. Further, as
men can gain skills and confidence in differentiating
between sexuality and intimacy, they can have
richer relationships with other men, thereby reducing
the tendency to rush into other relationships
with women for less than healthy reasons. The
program acknowledges that men who are excessively
reliant upon women are in no fit state to be in
a healthy relationship.
Men and Community - MENDS believes the
human race is primarily social in nature and therefore
the movement away from community is seen as unhealthy
for men individually and for society as a whole.
We encourage men to make the effort to connect
or reconnect with other men and women in community
in many spheres of human endeavour, including
accepting responsibility and being pro-active
in solving many of our shared problems.
and its Resolution - Conflict and anger
are not seen as bad in themselves; indeed they
are seen as providing much of the energy to effect
change. Their healthy expression is maintained
to be necessary, in creating fairer and more honest
interpersonal and social outcomes.
Violence and Safety - MENDS operates
on the explicit belief that anger is one of the
basic human emotions whose denial and suppression
is unhealthy, but that its expression as violence
is unacceptable and destructive. We promote mens
development of emotional literacy, including the
ability to identify the development of frustration
and anger early and to deal with high-risk emotional
states in a personally and socially responsible
- MENDS programs are developed and delivered to
make them accessible in every way possible to
men experiencing difficulty after relationship
breakdown. It is acknowledged that relationship
breakdown is not exclusive to men of dominant
community groups, so within the financial restrictions
imposed by the delivery of a new service, MENDS
commits to maximum accessibility of the program
to men regardless of their physical or financial
constraints, religious beliefs, cultural or ethnic
roots, sexual preference, age or locality.